We’re at Zwartkops on a hot January mid-morning, nibbling on plump cherries and almond biscotti, sipping cappuccinos on red leather couches. There’s even tiramisu on offer for those not too concerned about post-festive season EWS (Expanded Waistline Syndrome). But the food is just background noise. We’ve been invited to the race track outside Pretoria to thrash Abarths around with gay abandon, and so of course we oblige. Performance is what this car is all about and what better place to show it off?

IMAGE GALLERY

This is one of those launches where you don’t get to do flying laps and the back straight is interrupted by a chicane, but it actually works out very well: it is perfect for highlighting the Abarth’s agility, while a mandatory trundle down the pit lane is a good opportunity to think about the car for a few seconds, rather than plan the next apex. I’m having a wonderful time and it is all thanks to the esseesse (pronounced SS) package, a bolt-on kit of tuning accessories added to the standard 500 Abarth that I’d driven earlier. The kit comes in a heavily-branded unpainted wooden crate (imagine a great coffee-table with storage space for your man-cave), which you can either have fitted to your car within a year or 20000 km of purchasing it, or simply add the R37 000 cost to the HP agreement up front and take delivery of your new Abarth with the go-faster bits in place.

I really liked the car on the launch, which included driving to and from the track. But fast forward a couple of weeks and I’m at Avianto, in Muldersdrift, with a second Abarth – the tiny 850 TC. What do I like about it? The food, the authentic Tuscan village feel, and fond memories of a sister’s wedding a decade ago.

I like the car too. It’s honest. It’s sorted. And it does what it says on the tin, and that’s pack a big punch in its modestly-proportioned sheet metal. These sentiments apply equally to the esseesse, despite them being half-a-century apart.

Carlo Abarth had big ideas for small cars like the Fiat 500 and 600 and this philosophy enabled him to turn his business into a sizeable enterprise. Today, Fiat and Abarth are intertwined – the former owned by the latter since 1971.

Back to Zwartkops and a lap in the esseesse. Just when you’re convinced that you’ve overcooked it and are about to scatter the chicane’s orange cones far and wide, the car scrubs off speed with real determination while giving you regular and detailed updates through the sole of your right foot. And even when you feel you’re carrying a bit too much speed for that first, nearly-too-late, tug of the steering, the nose darts obediently right, and then left, and then right again, the confines of the man-made obstacle course seemingly no problem.

The brakes on the TC work too, thanks to a mix of Girling discs and rear drums on such a lightweight car, which was unusual at the start of the Sixties. The oldie also handles, thanks to trick dampers and the like.

The self-centring action on the esseesse’s steering – more apparent in Sport mode — is too hefty and artificial in fast sweeps but the loads at least act as a reminder that the front wheels aren’t yet straight, adding to a sensation of speed. Nearly 120kW and 230 Nm of torque can cause some distress in a front-driver but the Abarth has a ‘virtual’ limited-slip differential, activated via a TTC (Torque Transfer Control) button. It mimics a pukka LSD through corners, using the stability control sensors and the brakes to transfer the engine’s torque away from the unloaded inner wheel to the loaded outer wheel. It works too, and you can turn on the power hard and fast in the slow stuff helping it to rocket onto the straight bits without any FWD fun police taking over and spinning away unharnessed torque.

The standard 1.4-litre 16-valve turbocharged T-Jet power unit has a lively 99kW to start with but electronic tweaks and a free-flow air filter help max power climb to 118kW. That’s enough for a top speed of 211km/h with 0-100km/h acceleration in 7.4 seconds. While a little finicky, a properly tuned 850 TC is good for almost 150km/h, a 0-60mph (96km/h) time of 12.4 seconds and a 19.5-second quarter-mile.

The track stuff helps mask the fact that the 500 is an oldish design, something you’ll notice in the imperfect driving position brought about by a steering column which doesn’t adjust for reach, forcing taller drivers to sit a little further forward than they may like. Electric window buttons located on the centre console rather than the doors is another ergonomic quirk, but in the greater scheme of things it hardly matters when you are doing the four-wheel equivalent of hanging on the cables. To summarise; it’s got loads of grip, eager and assertive handling, and on the track is a mixture of bulldog and whippet – fast and tenacious with a bit of attitude.

While the drive home reveals some tyre rumble at speed on coarser surfaces and also highlights the lack of a tall cruising ratio, it is also a time to chill out and listen to some music. The entertainment system covers all the multi-media bases, and there’s also really good sound.

Talking sound, the dual exhaust outlets round it off figuratively and literally, with a surprisingly pleasing baritone without the dull, flat drone that generally undermine turbocharged cars as far as tailpipe acoustics go. Clearly, Abarth still knows how to make exhausts, which is no surprise seeing that’s the business the brand started with.

But the double-barrelled exhausts of the 850 TC crackle and pop deliciously and easily top the newcomer for purity of sound, as you gear down and it makes a grin-inducing sound. The fact that there’s a mere 55 horsepower is proof that you don’t need massive grunt to have fun. I’m in the middle of a sensory whirlwind and I can’t remember when I last drove a car so basic, yet which offers such unadulterated driving pleasure. You can appreciate why this car worked so well on tight and twisty Italian roads. When you see it on the tarmac, you can’t help but chuckle at just how tiny the footprint is: two will fit easily in a lane and there are touring motorcycles which take up as much space…

The three-spoke aluminium wheel is spindly (especially when compared with the fat, leather-trimmed item on its latter-day equivalent) and while the steering is light at speed there’s a wonderfully direct sense of communication with the front wheels. It’s a worm and roller system – unassisted, needless to say – and riding on tall, narrow tyres (13-inch 165/55 Pirellis on Campagnola wheels) you feel like you really are where the rubber meets the road.

No doubt Carlo Abarth would be pleased that collectors the world over have gone to such great lengths to preserve cars like the 850 TC (though due to the prosaic roots of the donor cars, Abarths are target not only for replicas but also outright frauds). Who knows, he may even approve of the authenticity of the latest offering from the stable that proudly bears his name.